Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
I got a chicken sandwich and a frosty out of her. Better then having sex
Yeah not really sure what I said but I remember "douchebag" and "fuck your own face"
To a 70 year old lady?!
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Congratulations, you are no longer the only person who has watched me drunkenly pee on their furniture.
She's still too new to the group to be comfortable with us just sitting down as a group and watching porn on the tv.
Congratulations, you've begun to unfuck your life.
I can't find the remote or the Doritos. Someone call 911. S.O.S. I sent this in Braille.
is there a way to say "yea i broke my wrist cause i fell down some stairs while tripping my face off on acid" without actually saying it?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean I just feel if I'm not being fat and lazy then I'm not really being myself
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
walk of shame across osu's campus on game day. i can see all the spots i threw up last night. its like my personal yellow brick road.
Dude I got in an Uber this morning and he goes “I drove you last night”\n“You got your dick sucked in the back seat”
Im crying watching 9/11 footage eating spray can cheese in my pajamas.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
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