did not feel like going to store to get condoms last night so went to her pantry and got a sandwich bag and a rubberband
did it work?
nope
North Korea, Best Korea!
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
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Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
And you kept repeating "I didn't know know that this was a no blow job zone."
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
Why yes actually, getting stoned and reading an AARP magazine IS totally where I wanted my night to end!
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So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
You tried tipping the cashier at Cook Out by shoving a dollar bill down his shirt and yelling "Magic Mike"
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
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