I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
I was in the bathroom throwing up...when I walked out he was sitting there watching porn and jacking off. He said, "Sounded like you were gonna be in there for a while."
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
mom found the triscuts in her underwear drawer, its done.
the room spins SO much faster in panama
Nothing like buying a handle and a 36 pack with a baby strapped on.
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
We passed out in his car so I had to find a way to inconspiciously make my walk of shame back inside to go get my shit. To make things more difficult I had no pants and the whole neighborhood was awake
It sucks laughing and vomiting at the same time, trust me. I kind of remember
Ya, so he said he had to change before he would go to Pizza Hut because he pissed himself. He ran into his house and came back wearing a cowboy hat.........and his piss covered jeans.
Well I'm sorry but he seemed so happy being drunk at noon.
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
It was a "my chaser needed a chaser" kind of night
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
Randomize
