her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
When you're about to leave, tell him "bye." At that point, he should say something. If he doesn't say anything, well, our drinks were free and he gets a free make out with yours truly.
That bus ride was like a tour of all the bushes I puked behind last night
We should never set our expectations higher than pizza bagels cause then our night is bound to get better
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im celebrating the fact lent is over and i can give blow jobs again.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Not sure if he was actually hot or hot in a "he brought a live chicken to the party" kinda way but I got his # regardless
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
found out that hot proper business chick in my class A) did a bar crawl last 2 night and still showed up to class and B) is 19 and C) so not as proper as I thought D) is single. How the fuck does that work? Freaking superwoman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
Can't even walk I haven't tried talking but I probably can't do that either
I woke up in bed spooning a vacuum cleaner
No, you are in the clear. The police officer finally just said "I give up" and walked away.
I don't know if I'm dying or this is just a mild inconvenience
Randomize