highlight of my day: just saw a crying girl get dropped off at home wearing only socks, booty shorts, and a dirty wifebeeter. I wonder what happened to the costume...
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
Only you could manage to look like a complete slut while wearing a turtle neck.
Right when I walked into the party my boyfriend stood up and yelled, "HEY TITS, GET ME A BEER!"
We uncovered another pile of vomit after you left. And i am not talking about the one in the vase
Apperanlty I was screaming "It's hard to swim with a broken ankle sir" and then tackled the lifeguard. The joys of blackouts
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
I think my cats understand what porn is. And it's all my fault.
Yes, but it's not new to me. It's like every time a new guy finds out I'm a squirter it's a novelty so they make me squirt and squirt and squirt until their bed is completely soaked. And then afterwards they complain that there isn't a dry bit to sleep on. No shit Sherlock.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
Being the hot sister definately has advantages, I'm pretty sure I ruined her engagement
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
Can you explain to me why I showed my boobs to the firemen to get free beer?
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