Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
Worst part was I had to fart super bad and didn't want to ruin the room so I farted in a pillow and threw it under the bed.
i wiped a booger on my final. end of semester present.
It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.
Well it looked like you were having a fucking apiphany sitting at the toilet with a t shirt around your head
I will always remember that night by waking up in that tablecloth the next morning
The guy you hooked up with is asleep in the tub. I just pee'd and he said 'turn off the tap' before snoring again.
Watching frozen planet. There's a beach master sea lion with about 50 sea lion bitches fighting another sea lion for said bitches. It's a bloody battle. Dude. You have over 50. Share.
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
The door opens out but somehow she managed to kick it in..
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
I feel you. I woke up butt naked on top of my sheets with a plate of cheese next to my bed...
All I could think about while we were fucking was what Hogwarts house he would be in
I just dominated some guy while wearing your moms thong
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