i just wanna soil my oats bro
just got pizza delivered to the hot tub. its easier than i thought to be this lazy
how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
Fell asleep in bio again. Sometimes i feel like college is just one really expensive nap.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Some dude just bet me $8 I couldn't smoke a pack of cigarettes in an hour...It sounds stupid, but I really wanna do it. If I survive, I'll have $8 and it'll look good on my resume.
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I think she just stepped in a piece of mac and cheese, picked it off the bottom of her foot and ate it.
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My sugar daddy is a bigger asshole than i am. What's wrong here?
There should be a rule.......that if you have a small penis you must wear a hat with propellers on it so you can fly the hell off the planet.
Needs to be more caveman. "Me kill roommate. You watch. Then sex time with our genitals."
My sweat smells like Wild Turkey. I'm really feeling the holiday spirit.
I just used my sisters cheerleading plaque and a children's book to crush up painkillers to snort. Happy Friday
On a scale of 1-10 how inappropriate is it for me to ask if Walgreens offers teacher discounts when purchasing a Plan B pill?
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