I love how all these freshman girls think that they can wear what they wore last summer... freshman 15 at its skankiest
Blood drive hookups: you will probably faint during the sex, but at least you know neither of you has AIDS
Chinatown. Her fortune cookie said "accept the next proposition you receive." TELL ME NO NOW.
Dude, she gave me a handski that literally felt like she was starting a lawn mower...
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The Angel on my shoulder is now resorting to merely reminding me that, "You will regret this later." I'm not sure if he's learning how I think or just giving up. Either way, should make life a bit more interesting.
Come out Saturday. It's for my lesbian daughter from the future birthday.
I don't think people appreciate how hard it is to fuck in a portapotty. Sarah and I had train for that shit.
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Fuck away man. Like 3% of these new people will be back next week. This is the best week of the year to slam bitches at the gym.
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Well she started to strip and when she slung her hair at me, she painted my face with sweat. A LOT OF SWEAT. It was a weird boner.
Officially crunch time. It's my last year of grad school and I've yet to get blown in a school library. The parking garage was less than a block away though.
oh man that would be weird.. i feel like we should do dirty things before anything super intimate like a massage.
He's a 30 yr old man who voluntarily goes by Stevie and his job title is "Jumbotron Operator". There's a 97.5% chance he lives in his mom's basement. STOP THIS NOW!!!
So anyway, I'm just floating along life with my vibrator and low expectations.
I'm actually glad the whole thing's over now. It's exhausting to fake a pregnancy.
Imagine not having to fake it.
Yeah, I should never have kids, probably.
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