I cont stop tolking in a british axsent
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
Why do bread and butter chips remind me of eating out your mom?
she laid there and continued moaning loudly for like 10 minutes after we were done, just so that her mom would be jealous
fuck it. im taking monday off to do some Jagering.
Are you feeling okay?
Right now, not a single thing feels even slightly okay. That hungover.
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
A guy just grabbed my balls before he shook my hand because he thought he knew me.
is there a line between daddy kink and oedipus complex?
Currently watching Zombie Sharks while high. This is why I love Shark Week.
Dude. I need you to practice dancing around in your banana hamock. Party boy style. I'll call later with details.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
All my friends are getting married and I'm pole dancing in a tattoo shop. I don't know how I feel about this.
They spent thousands on one day. You made $76 in 30 minutes. You should feel great about that.
Angels sing when his face is between my thighs. I came 3 times before he even came up for air.
We could just go to Vegas and celebrate my singlehood and not contributing to the population.
Randomize
