i'm sure her mom would have loved to find out her daughter has herpes via facebook
People in love make me want to vomit
I'm about to enter vancouver's biggest liquor store. I feel like I should sent you a "wish you were here" postcard.
well right now he's telling us a story how he befriended a racoon
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everything tastes like hotdogs and shame.
Only I can have a panic attack in the back seat of a cop car and have them move me to the front seat.
i sucked his cock and got snuggles in return. I'm the mother Theresa of giving in a relationship.
The best part about drinking boxed wine is you can blow up the bag and use it as a pillow
Halloween night fail: My boob sweat from keeping my phone in my bra caused the front screen to stop working from water damage.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
trust me. coming from a bonafide dirtbag, this dude is up to shady shit
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
She just asked to come over. She's either going to bring one of her dads guns and kill me or we're going to end up having insane lesbian sex.
What did we do last night and why in the fuck were there carrots in my pocket?
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
I’m not sure she knows my name. She introduced me as “the fuck toy”
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