Hope the move went well! I'll miss you!
you are a cunt and I hated living with you and your skeezy boyfriend.Just thought I'd get that out there.
You can bone my sister, but I will end our friendship if you write 'LOLERS' one more time at the end of your texts.
she was like a sexier Rosie O'Donnel
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
I am currently listening to someone take a shit. I hate the hole in the ceiling.
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
you're going to have to hot glue me into my dress tonight. there's no way out.
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
Can we make a pact that if we're 40 and still sluts that aren't married we can get civil unioned the fuck up and raise an asian baby as our own?
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Maybe there is a secret pocket full of cocaine in that spiderman wallet.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
I walked in describing her boobs thinking I was talking to you only to hear dad say 'I remember when your moms were like that'. ALWAYS tell me when they get home early. Always
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