I am drinking with my family and the average drinking tolerance is a shot and a half. I feel like the incredible hulk.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
lets make a pact to never make a pregnancy pact
Babe, the 4 years we've been together have been amazing. Will you marry me?
are you seriously doing this over text message
hahaha no, but i am dumping you.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
been home a week and haven't blacked out yet. i miss college
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Party Liz is going to have to have her wings clipped until someone gets me some baby reins to wear
I had her buy me a cock ring, so we might test that out. We are presently playing yahtzee.
Cock rings and yahtzee. Like peanut butter and jelly.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Look, I tried but his dick tasted like disappointment.
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
Does having sex in an airport bathroom with a girl you just met at the bar count as the mile high club? ...no?
whole 5th of capt = waking up in the shower after 2 hours and the whole house asking why i'm STILL in a towel. and me having nothing to say
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