I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I'm on page 4.
Im on beer infinity
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
I woke up next to her this morning and couldn't remember her name. Luckily, she had written it on my hand so that I could add her on facebook.
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
Okay well someone asked "IS HE HOMELESS?" about me so I need to try and find somebody.
Fuck. I just got my nipple tweaked by a plus size drag queen in a purple dress. I feel like I got molested by Grimace.
This guy keeps going off in the metal detector. When is it appropriate for me to punch him in the throat just in case?
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
I don't remember coming in last night, but apparently I ate a piece of pizza because when I woke up I had pizza crust stuck to the back of my thighs.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
Still, being medically ordered to stuff things in your vagina is amazing.
He said I was so drunk and high that I had a conversation w/ his goldfish. The video shows me clearly conversing as if talking to a person w/ pauses in conversation and everything
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
Randomize
