If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
P.S. theres no milk for breakfast, but theres plenty of beer or red wine. you decide.
then she made me sanitize my hands before fingering her...i may have found my soulmate
kerrys trying to convince everyone in the bar shes a lesbian. cheers to not being the drunkest girl in the room. i probably wont piss myself tonight.
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
I woke up naked except for someone else's socks. Im so proud
how did you know i stayed over last night?
there was a trail of glow sticks and cheetos from the front door all the way to his bedroom
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
She says the reason I don't talk to her is because I'm "emotionally lazy" what ever that means
I have wine with a bendy straw bitches I can do fucking anything
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
Hello! Time means nothing. Good morning! I have a vague idea of what day it is.
It is Muednethiday, March 34th, in the Year of Our Lord Joe Exotic 3099.
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