i wrote down the address for planned parenthood on the back of the receipt for the condom that broke
you know by doing this we are using dad as a drug mule right?
Text me if you also stopped reading harry potter in the 4th grade and wanna go to the bars tonight instead of the midnight premiere
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I accidently showed a girl my balls already today. Made me think of you.
Just called my dad drunk from bed to ask for bacon.. my niece texted me when it was ready.. i'm never moving out
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
I heard you shushing me, but my screaming orgasm drowned it out.
There is an alarming amount of food in my bra.
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Good for you, kid with a beer in hand as you walk to your 11 am class.
I thought this was a dry campus.
That means you have to bring your own beer from home.
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
the fact that I've been his fuck buddy for a year, and I'm pregnant isn't bothering me. the fact that he didn't tell me about his girlfriend does.
Nothing personal but yes I would be suspicious If I saw 3 guys and 2 girls in the same bathroom stall together
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