I'm sitting in front of the mirror eating cereal and pondering how my boobs got so big
Welcome to my life
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
Not sure. No solid plans. Just tanning nude.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My liver is begging me not to go, but sadly enough for him my feet and hands control me getting there.
That is NOT what pussyfooting around means. Try that again with your toe and I break it off.
He asked me how france is treating me
Tell him you got so much dick you may never come back to the US. That ought to keep him away
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
I fit in backpacks. BOOM HERE I AM! Like a stripper from a cake.
And now let us go forth, and be garbage people in public.
Isn't that our default mode?
He’s actually a personal trainer. He said he hasn’t taught yoga in a while but the stripper prefers to introduce him as a yoga teacher
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
Randomize