doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
when she said she would show you her other bow, she ment she wanted you to bend her over and see the tattoo on her lower back you idiot
I woke up and peed for 26 seconds this morning. 26 seconds!
The door to door salesmen do not expect you to be drunk at 3 in the afternoon
I got us a lift home. Payment may require me giving road head, are you cool just chilling in the back seat pretending to be oblivious to this happening?
Tornado booty call.. dedication
For once I want to have sex without having to google the after effects of it.
I walked in, the bartender looked at me, grabbed 3 shot glasses and a pounder. Lined them up on the bar then made a line with salt on the other side of them and said I wasn't allowed to cross it.
Some guy was coming onto me last night and in the middle of it all he said: 'It literally says this on my birth certificate: Francis Coburt: The Guy Who Can Pull Two Beers Outta His Pants Like Magic.'
Just set out 2 water bottles as an offering to my hungover self.
Awk moment when I forgot to tell my hookup about visitor parking so he got towed
When I come home and take my bra off and I'm served with a perfect grilled cheese along with a glass of wine. Priceless.
The car smells like weed is an understatement.
Someone signed my nipple.
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