so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
New drinking game: take a shot everytime Jay-Z is played during the NFL draft.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
No I'm not coming over. That Bob Ross drinking game is too intense.
I just watched a guy pee from a second floor window onto the line of 100 people waiting to get in.
I need you to do me a favor and hide my sword from me tonight. I'm planning on drinking my weight in vodka and I don't trust myself enough to not run through campus screaming "I AM SPARTA!" You'll be saving me a mugshot as well as saving some innocent girls from tears.
Told some chick I'm a virgin, on my way to her house as I type this. Debating crying afterwards to fuck with her head.
Dude, you're only mentioning the Bro Code so I can't get any
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
I was sprawled on his bed and heard him and a girl walk in the apartment. I jumped out the window and am walking down main street wrapped in an american flag blanket. Can you pick me up?
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