Mind blown. Apparently, it's PRErogative, not PERogative. I blame Bobby Brown.
I REALLY appreciate you guys taking care of me when im wasted but i think its weird when i wake up in different clothes than black out in
the choice between paying your electricity bill and getting herpes medicine is a tough one.
She started crying while we were cooking shrimp because 'Under the Sea" came on Pandora
I'm 2 blowjobs away from girlfriend status....don't tell me I don't know how to have an adult relationship
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Remember the 3 things that are off limits? They're fair game if you get here in the next 5 minutes
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
He wheeled me around walmart in a cart, and stole at least 30 dollars of junior mints fpr me. Best date ever.
I tried to pay my tab and go home but she wrote me a "list of things I'm good at" with fellatio as no 1...
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
FRIENDS DON'T LET FRIENDS WASTE THE LAST ADDERALL.
SShout out to Barney the Dinosaur for teaching me how to sing the ABCs backward. I just scored a free pitcher.
Nothing like an afternoon walk of shame across campus on parent's weekend. Damn.
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