My cleaning lady broke my bubbler. It's awkward between us now.
Why?
Because she knows I do drugs and I know she's a clumsy bitch.
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
I am as serious as getting herpes in Mexico...
What do herpes have to do with anything?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
NO I WOULD NOT GET A GUMMER FROM A GRANDMOTHER
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Sorry I invoked the "everyones getting smacked including myself policy last night"
It's rum buckets o'clock
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Never ever make a tattoo bet. I now have a shamrock on my dick.
There's just something so liberating about drinking a beer with no pants on
I was sitting here smiling wondering why i'm so fucking happy at work. cookie has kicked in
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
Oh man I knew I took that Molly too soon, talkin to some Scottish people lol but don’t like rollin in pizza restaurants.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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