Who do you think planted the wheat? Who do you think cleared the land and killed off the native inhabitants? Women?
Hotel room at 3 am. She's 42. Stockings and heels. All because I opened with a joke about cougar hunting. We'll high-five later.
if three guys were standing in front of you and they differed only in the hairiness of the groin who would you choose: smooth as a baby's bottom, the grass lands or the amazon jungle?
i think you're getting too neurotic about why she won't touch you.
there were no ball for pong so he bought cat toys..... they had bells in them
my boyfriend just told me he used to have genital herpes. I was gonna have sex with him, but now it's SOOO over.
what kind of stupid fuck tells you that BEFORE sex? he is definitely not a keeper.
Fell into a man hole last night. I've been bleeding since 11pm. Got kicked out of the bar for being bloody.
Try not to bring up the fact that I woke up and couldn't find my pants... He might get the wrong idea.
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
Do you remember using the heel of your shoe as a shish kabob stick? You offered me some chicken, but I declined.
I may be new to bar life, but full on grabbing my vag shouldn't happen...anywhere.
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
Do you know how awkward it is to get a dick pic while working at babies r us?
I said I wanted pizza tattoo on my ass and the tattooist asked me what I wanted on it.
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
roommate singing save a horse ride a cowboy wearing a cowboy hat a bikini and jeans while humping the couch.
Randomize
