this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
either she doesn't know how to dress properly on a sunday morning stroll, or I just saw a 60 year old on a walk of shame
Lots of explosions. Minor nudity. Full penetration and lots of tuxedos.
i just sold a bong and some oregano to fifth graders for sixty dollars. doing something tonight?
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
Came home plastered at 8am. Roommate had hot glued all the ashtrays and various items to their surfaces. Couldn't handle it. Went back to the bar.
I just need to stick to one night stands and delete social media
Not sure how but he broke three of his fingers while giving a blowjob. How does someone that accident prone survive to adulthood?
Emergency. I brought a boy home and we fell asleep, but I just woke up to him peeing against my bedroom wall. So I brought him to the bathroom but he fell over and he's sleeping in the tub. Can I leave him there? Because that's what I've done.
Better the hardwood than the carpet, right?
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Anyway, that's been my evening- crying and looking up diabetes symptoms. How was your night?
Randomize
