just googled chastity belt to see if it really exist..
It happened again. Now theres even more baby powder and its all over the place, I'm not cleaning that house.
She scratched my sunburn during sex. I didn't know whether to cry or cum
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Um yeah. I just puked. And found your contact.
i think the theme of this summer is "shitting in weird locations."
Well it's official... The first guy I ever gave head to now holds 2 world records. Should I text him asking if I can try and break my record?
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
You got pulled on stage by a stripper who wore ruffled ankle socks and did jumping jacks for her dance. Then you were put in a chokehold by a security guard that almost cried because you supposedly said "fuck you!" to him.
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
Lesson learned. Don't roleplay with a real knife.
Then I did coke with my taxi driver where he then ended up paying me for the drive. You should try being a girl sometime it's super sick.
We had sex on his sofa while his friend cheered and threw bugles at us
this periodpocalypse needs to be over. I need head
Found your brother. He was passed out in the tub holding a bottle of Shatto milk wearing nothing but his tighty-whities.
Randomize
