You can't special order awesome
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
he squeezed my boobs like he didn't know what else to do with them, then turned down head...
told you he was gay.
Explain to me how it was that you spent the entire night playing pool with three lesbians and did not get a foursome out of it.
He has to watch his girlfriends kitten. Even when she is in Vegas, her pussy keeps him from getting into mine.
he's just a really huge penis that sells weed
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Please tell me I made it home with both shoes on
Nope
i just woke up to her giving me a toothy BJ so I had to break into your bedroom and steal about 4 condoms. Sorry for waking you. :(
I was gonna be Romantic and write your name in emoji eggplants but A's are hard
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
I ate 2 pot cookies before we left the house. Fuck Pokemon. I'm playing my own game.
Note to Self: Never again eat a weed brownie by yourself two hours before a tornado warning in your exact location.
Chick in the kitchen making breakfast.. Yours or mine?
Randomize
