The nice sales man at 711 gave me a handful of free lighters for buying a carton of cigarettes. I guess the depressed damsel in distress look works for me.
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Just got super judged by a walmart cashier for buying diet pills and candy in the same transaction. Like she has her life figured out.
why are all my papers due the day after my potential hangover
Inquiring minds want to know if your Bf is circumcised
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I don't know at which point last night turned terribly, terribly wrong, but it was somewhere around Motel 6, specifically the parking lot.
Dude. I am seriously trying SO hard not to be amused by Honey Boo Boo. But the fact is, she just got a mani pedi with her gay uncle Poodle, and he got a discount because he only has nine toes, and I am ALL IN.
I wish they would just make alcoholic protein shakes already.
Def over. He sent me a nude selfie but cropped it right above his junk. Total Silence of the Fucking lambs looking.
IM BACK TOGETHER WITH MY BF AND HERE YOU ARE SUCKING DICK FROM 2009
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
