Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(540): View more from Virginia

Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting.

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(540): Sometimes I think its so cool that a dick that has been inside kate moss has also been inside me. So exciting. http://tfl.nu/24nu

Replies (56) Good night (7762) Bad night (1271)
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(310): View more from California

I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high

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(310): I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high http://tfl.nu/hr6z

Replies (9) Good night (2457) Bad night (965)
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(850): View more from Florida

I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken.

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(850): I've drank myself into a smaller pants size. Who ever said alcoholism was unhealthy was mistaken. http://tfl.nu/xxkh

Replies (23) Good night (4607) Bad night (837)
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(715): View more from Wisconsin

and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing

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(715): and honestly a story about how you met your future husband that DOESN'T include the words "creeped him on facebook" is really not a story worth sharing http://tfl.nu/e1xa

Replies (11) Good night (3774) Bad night (1373)
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(267): View more from Pennsylvania

we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself.

(215): View more from Pennsylvania

did he notice?

(267): View more from Pennsylvania

of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up..

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(267): we were hanging out in his room and he decided to play WoW.. so i took off all my clothes while he wasn't paying attention and laid on his bed and started playing with myself. (215): did he notice? (267): of course he didn't notice.. he was playing a fiesty level 1 fucker that wouldn't give up.. http://tfl.nu/7kng

Replies (83) Good night (1876) Bad night (10166)
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(406): View more from Montana

I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"

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(406): I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money" http://tfl.nu/7mg6

Replies (13) Good night (5059) Bad night (1337)
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(702): View more from Nevada

Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now

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(702): Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now http://tfl.nu/aoyo

Replies (22) Good night (4557) Bad night (948)
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(630): View more from Illinois

I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'

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(630): I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..' http://tfl.nu/mj73

Replies (6) Good night (2951) Bad night (838)
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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means.

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(724): look up what dreaming that you're in a lesbian relationship with a manatee means. http://tfl.nu/mq55

Replies (10) Good night (3468) Bad night (1169)
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(954): View more from Florida

Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart?

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(954): Two questions: what are you doing RIGHT NOW? and do you know how to drive a golf cart? http://tfl.nu/oywi

Replies (8) Good night (3827) Bad night (957)
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(228): View more from Mississippi

We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver

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(228): We designated a driver... But it was me..... So we designated another driver http://tfl.nu/kd5u

Replies (4) Good night (1705) Bad night (506)
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(740): View more from Ohio

Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!

(740): View more from Ohio

And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes

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(740): Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed! (740): And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes http://tfl.nu/xgjj

Replies (4) Good night (698) Bad night (384)
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(+44): View more from United Kingdom

There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though.

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(+44): There must be a happy medium universe where you get it on with my girlfriend enough to cause me pain but not a full on cardiac arrest. It's a fine line to tread though. http://tfl.nu/j5bh

Replies (2) Good night (266) Bad night (649)
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(925): View more from California

You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub

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(925): You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub http://tfl.nu/o6o5

Replies (0) Good night (453) Bad night (247)
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(304): View more from West Virginia

I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket.

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(304): I want the address of the individual responsible for strawbeeritas. I want to send them gift basket. http://tfl.nu/s9lg

Replies (1) Good night (494) Bad night (156)

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