it must be christmas time, i've got a hankering to give a virgin a baby....
I don't think I have ever been told that I am "probably too drunk to pet the stingrays" by a cop before.
I love when I'm alone in the house. It's like pants were never invented.
I would also like to inform you that I can no longer lay on my back because my tailbone is bruised from the nightstand. Good job.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was like the perfect storm of bad decisions.
I decided staying home, watching porn and masterbating was a much better choice than the gym. And I was right.
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
I imagine it like the scene in Sorceror's Stone, but instead of flying keys, it's flying dicks.
That is a dream.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This is like 50 shades on steroids but with healthy relationship models and mutual respect among all parties involved and lesbian activity.
Here's a concept though: eating pasta while getting laid
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
It's very finicky. Like baking. or BDSM.
Randomize