she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
and i looked up. we had an audience...
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
I dunno if we should get high tonight man. its daylight savings. time travel is just too much for me right now.
I just remembered our "im drunk enough to look at your vagina" conversation. Is that offer still valid? I really think I need a second opinion
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I have no idea. There are 6 asians singing hey soul sister to me right now.
Smoked before work and just remembered i left pringles in my desk last time i was high. SCORE
Not my type. One of those types that loves that they're educated, could drink their red wine and have an intellectual conversation and have a wonderful time
An adult?
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Should I apologize to him for saying I wanted to punch him in the face as I was digging through the trash?
He lives 20 minutes away driving distance and decided to walk. I talked to him today and he took a nap along the way... In a cemetery.
Randomize
