It's what's on the inside that counts(972): They probably have big open vaginas so the inside is no good
dude, despite what happened last night, I'm not gay
maybe touching the ground while going 70 wasn't such a great idea after all..
if you lined all their dicks up next to eachother, it would be like at&t bars
You said you were going to take the sideview mirror to your own car so that nobody would steal it. Thats why you woke up with it.
Walked girl from last night to car as gf was driving up. Got slow clap from neighbors.
you can officially check off peeing off the 5th floor while shouting "I want to break the guinness world record for longest piss stream" off your college to do list.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
When you're high, you dance like an injured velociraptor.
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
It's amazing the amount I can accomplish with a glass of wine in my hand.
Honestly I don't even have room for feelings after that Taco Bell
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
You either got a dog, or you have a boy over. I can't tell from the noises which it is.
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