ha- omfg whatt the fuck is wrong w me. Alcohol+third cousins= bad decisions
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
he's 25, hott, and leaving for iraq tuesday, i wanna get in as much as possible...
your life is a nick sparks novel waiting to happen
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
it's kinda bad that we're already planning travel arrangements to his funeral
So then I proceeded to the kitchen to make my "specialty," which consisted of a frozen veggie burger topped with peanut butter. I guess he ate it too.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My body is like , remember when you wouldn't let me puke last night? Good luck at work fucker.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Dude. So. Much. Sex. Find a girl in her 30s. Now.
This is the weekend we were supposed to be in Vegas making bad decisions hoping no one got VD, not stuck at home for the 900th day in a row
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