Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Just took a celebratory "i havent slept with anyone in this bar" shot. yesssss....
You should have been there to see the look on her face when I told her that my dog gives better head than her. It was a beautiful symphony of shock, anger, and disbelief.
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
Is it wrong that I want to take the baby bump in her facebook pictures as "meal-ticket"?
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
It's statistically impossible for there not to be at least one guy sexting you right now
Enjoy the penises
It was great. He never spoke.
That's not why it was great, just that's all I remember.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Some bitch is passed out in a pool of vomit. Fucking lightweight, it's only 8.30.
Oh, wait.. That's you.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
Randomize
