If you think im a hippy you should see these girls. They would scissor mother nature if they had the chance.
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
i kept drunkenly begging people i met to be in my facebook mafia
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
So, I just sold my textbook to have money for Plan B.
Just saw a dude hanging out a window upside down chugging a 60 of vodka. This weekend is big for everyone I guess
Tell me right now I did the right thing by not fucking my sick gf at 3 am with her family home... Tell me my balls hurt for noble reasons.
I'll be there. With Doritos and whisky. Don't expect much more.
Road trip to buy me a baby zebra..are you in or are you in?
You stole a fry from a complete stranger. He wasn't happy. Then you said fuck it and stole the whole poutine and ran down the street while he stared in shock.
i would have fingered myself to death by now but the dog wont stop staring at me
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
And to celebrate the raising of our lord I just purchased a bunny buttplug. Am I doing this Easter thing right?
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