: south campus drug res life name erik. Love, tran
After last night, I could never be a politician.
so i was creeping on him today and there was like nothing new except he became a fan of getting dome
i wish i could be like. "i like giving dome, lets be friends"
Maybe she got knocked up by accident. I still refuse to believe that anyone actually INTENTIONALLY gets pregnant.
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
im seconds away from chugging that vodka and preforming the surgery on myself.
I mean turning down birthday sex is never the answer
he just sat there, in the doorway of my dorm room, chuggin a fifth like nobodys buisness.. don't know whether to fuck him or be afraid of his confidence
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
Please tell me you werent the one who replaced every beer bottle in my fridge with a picture of a baby kitten.
... and if i was..
Fuck. You.
I'll pass on that plan. The lack of my penis in new vaginas is no where on the itinerary.
My boss doesn't know what jello shots are. I've lost faith in this company.
One day I'm gonna have to send my roommate a "sorry I got high and forgot you were in the room and masturbated next to you" fruit basket
You are in my phone as "Thigh Gap" and you apparently work for "DO NOT DRUNK TEXT, INC." That is why I called you six times last night. So unless you take a second job at "NO DRUNK DIALING LLC" expect more. PS I am sober so this is legit.
Randomize
