i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
i friday night watching house. god, i need a life, friends, and a legitimate fake id.
It was awkward until we both realized our obsessions with harry potter and sangrias were the same. Now were in love.
You need tk get a life and stop texting me about fictional characters. I don't give a shit.
Was it a mistake telling him I couldn't get the abortion until I was 2 months along on the first date?
totally just realized while washing my face that Cetaphil looks like semen.
Of course, I believed he would find me irrestible...sloppy drunk, chugging from a bottle of chardonnay, and completely naked because those kids stole my clothes as I was swimming on their private beach
We were in the shower and he sat down an wouldn't do anything. I'm so glad he manscapes. It made washing his balls less awkward.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
well his nickname is liver of steel so it makes sense that his balls follow suit. tell him i say sorry
I may hire someone just to sell my family the drugs they keep asking me for. It's cutting into my doing drugs time.
aha we'll just say that my mind was so focused on A Bugs Life that it was hard to maintain an erection
our relationship was basically a one night stand, with a three week long, morning after
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
We just broke up and deleting his dick pics is the hardest thing I've ever had to do.
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