your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
does he have a tent? the camping kind not the boner kind.
yeah so i didn't even realize i was on meth until the next morning
I am at a striph cluv. They are ovealls everywhere. I have hot rock botto.
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
chastity bono is officially a man...and has a really hot girlfriend...life doesn't make sense
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I'm bringing vagina and cookies. You'll be fine.
I woke up with his condom in my mouth. I actually use them now you should be proud of me.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
I woke up cuddling a ham. That's not a euphemism. I actually slept with an entire ham.
Random boy motorboated me, handed me a business card congratulating me on my motorboat, winked and walked out with some other girl
Find him and marry him.
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