just survived the first fart of the relationship.
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
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I'm not sure what's more surprising, the fact that she said I reminded her of Danny Devito, or the fact that it got me laid.
I need input, can I pre-game my cat scan?
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
we were playing waterfall, then strip waterfall, then we were just listening to music, drinking, and slowly becoming more naked
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm beer bonging chocolate fondue. That's how my Valentines Day is going.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Where did you go?
I'm not really sure. They have flavored vodka. I like it and I'm never leaving. Ever.
he looked at me and said 'happiness is a warm blanket' then stole my vodka.
just wanted to eat pizza off his dick so he let me and he can never forget it
I have bruises everywhere an I broke the lamp. So ya I'd considerate rough sex.
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