whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
You're pretty and everything..but you aren't worth the DUI
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
is he apposed to sex in general? or just porch sex?
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
Yeah her jello shots are the next closest thing to a lethal injection. That potent.
That's probably when I climbed a tree and told everyone I was an ornament
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
Why do all the Father's Day cards talk about what a great dad they are? Why can't there be one that says something like "Thanks for sticking it to mom and making me possible, your sperm was appreciated."
i just got carded for condoms. wtf.....this is new. isnt safe sex a good thing?
Next time we smoke please remind me to put my bong back in my build a bear box. My mom says if I leave it out one more time she's keeping it for herself.
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Randomize
