you washed your face with toilet water last night.. i tried to stop you but you wouldn't have it.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
dude i woke up in a pile of chocolate chips. this has to stop happening
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
If you can't accept "I'm sorry I was mean to you" bjs from 19 year old girls, then who can you
We dropped so many bottles they would only give us plastic cups. We actually drank ourselves back to preschool.
I should be a dude... Walking a goat on a rope is a total chick magnet.
We have a vagina exchange agreement. Neither of us can hook up with any of our own law firm's summer associates. So we have a scout and referral program and invite each other to the other firm's summer events. Criss-cross!! Works every summer.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
It's just a friend who is recently single and I'm going to heal his broken heart with my vagina
so evidently blowing a guy does not mean he will say hi to you when he sees you in class.. in case you're ever wondering
I hate that I still want him to look at me as the vagina that got away.
Why are you drunk at the library?
Why not?
Have you ever been anal in a bush on the Vegas strip drunk?
Randomize
