One girl and one boy is just not enough.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I'm pretty sure this isn't my phone, but I do like these nude pics
I cant leave dude. theres a horse with a top hat on
Didn't get laid. But got a free pie from a waitress. A whole pie.
Well last time he got out of rehab he lasted 6 hours. So 3 days this time is quite an accomplishment.
Wow. I grabbed the wrong container to rinse my contacts- it was a beer. And it comes out waaaay faster than saline.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
He showed up at my house, drunk, proclaiming that he needed to fuck me...my dad let him in
Sorry, that was mean and I didn't mean it. I'm just mad at condoms
Yeah so then I used the selfie stick his mom gave me to take nudes
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
saw a family tailgating a graduation with hard liquor... i'm assuming yours?
are you shitting me? they told me they'd at least wait until 10am
How are you feeling today?
Like Satan handed me a grenade and ass sandwich.
are you comparing glasses to pregnancy
Randomize
