Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
I guess so. I don't really give a fuck. I think I'm going to jerk off really loudly tonight just to keep them on their toes
We just spray painted his balls while he is passed out....I cant wait to see him try to figure this out in the morning.
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I'm afraid to text her because most of the time she just replies with "cockblock."
Ethically speaking on a scale from 1 to morally wrong, how wrong would it be to give babies ambien? Hypothetically speaking.
its safe to say i can delete the contact in my phone "brandon random bus make out" from spring break right?
Well this lady at the bar told me I was a natural on the tambourine and that it was my God given talent. and then she gave me a tambourine.
Have u seen my thong? Last time i saw it was drenched in vodka and on his brothers broken lamp.
Nah but tell him his boxers made it to the basement
He's acting like I should like him more than vodka and Taco Bell, but I just don't ser that happening.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
wait no I wore my bra home that morning. I stole someone's bra last night?
My drug dealer is giving me a 15% veterans discount on my weed for nov 11th
That's the best thing I've heard all week.
Just bought shot glasses from the thrift store. I think the guy buying a winter coat was even judging me.
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