I seem to have left my pride at pride
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
We talked him into tasing himself.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The staff doesn't like it when you try and take your wheelchair for a joy ride since I've been waiting for an hour and a half.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
You know, I've never slept in a rug with anyone before you
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Desperate times call for desperate measures. But he promised me no small talk so that was nice
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
THIS IS AN AMERICAN HORROR STORY I CAN'T FIND MY VIBRATOR ANYWHERE WHICH MEANS I LOST IT WHEN I MOVED WHICH MEANS MY POOR VIBRATOR IS OUT THERE IN THE WORLD ALL ALONE RIGHT NOW WHAT AM I GOING TO DO
my mom talks about my drinking like its a problem and yet this morning she fills me a solo cup with champagne for the shower.
Act your age.
I am. I'm acting like a drunk 20 year old.
Randomize