I'll just stay a virgin forever then
You still have to go anyway
Then I guess I'll have to start sleeping around
yeah i just made her a character on oregon trail and i hope she gets dysentry and dies. that'll show her.
imagine if the morning after your status automatically updated with the name of the person you hooked up with
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude idk, apparently telling two drunk chicks 'that's whats up' after watching them lick eachother's face wasn't the compliment they were looking for. I mean I was fucking hammered.
Wow.
I found a map from his room to his bathroom this morning in my purse. Apparently I was too fucked up to get there without one.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
Only you would get a date out of getting hit by a car
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
I am never taking a razor down there again. He'll have to love me as I am.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
Randomize