Ok Hollywood, I get it. Megan Fox is hot. Now she is in a movie where she is so hot that dudes just fucking die. Great.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
He looked at my vag and said "you have a nice situation down there. Good work"
She just had to change the song on the radio cause I was tap dancing on her windshield
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I woke up to him yelling "WHO SLEEPS WITH A BEER IN THEIR HAND?!?" this of course, startled me awake and made me spill the aforementioned beer. So I guess the a answer is- not this girl, not anymore. Asshole
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
But the drunk streaking fizzled when one of jake's friends took a piss while running with a massive erection.
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
'twas the night before moms weekend and all were blacked out. Not a coug was sober not even farm house. I was down to fuck but you were not in sight, so I bid pullmania a sweet goodnight.
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So that 100 days of sobriety thing I told you about last week? Lasted all of 4 days. Fuck it, life's too short
Going back to the ever classy sneak out to the fridge and swig liquor from the bottle method. That it is legal for me to drink here makes the fact that I have to do this all the more depressing.
You need to finger her with the Spock hand sign since she loves Star Trek.
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
Crying into a glass of wine at 10 am isn't exactly how I planned this day to go
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
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