U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
He just found another high guy at wal-mart. There now friends. His friend is eating a cupcake
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
Also, we accidentally donated a bong to goodwill
I'm pretty sure I did the Macarena with a gay guy while shot gunning a beer
I don't care how fucking drunk you are, you don't forget wanting to shove a wine bottle up someone's ass.
Found an old burrito under my bed
You are a sick fuck
I don't want my liquor store dad to judge me...
Kick open the door, strike a pose, steal a boyfriend, end scene.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
I've been in town for almost 36 hrs and I haven't made out with a stranger yet - I consider THAT a record!
Left him blackout in the cab, gave 20$ to the cabbie and said drive until the meter said he wasn't getting a tip.
Bangkok has him now.
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