Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
i kinda want to bang the mythbusters girl... i bet she's got a nice snapper
I woke up to my dog trying to clean my vagina.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We have to give a final comment in english, i think i might say "i learned it's a bad idea to make out with people in your classes who have girlfriends."
Bro I can't jerk it to my phone anymore. I feel Siri staring back, and she's real disappointed.
We had fun with our Indiana Jones role-playing until I whipped myself in the dick with my belt.
Apparently I'm the last girl he had sex with. That was over a month ago. If he can go that long without sex then he's clearly not the guy for me
I got kicked out of the hotel after wandering into the banquet kitchen at 2am trying to find the shrimp....so we're power napping in the car and then driving to madison.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
Dude we both faced 40s of steel reserve which is like saying, "Hey, I'm a complete piece of shit!"
Her tutu was on the floor and she wouldn't take off her crown. She kept saying you're fucking a princess!
The bad news is that I stole all your drugs. The good news is that ITS KICKING IN!
I get stoned and write a 15 page history report in two hours. She gets stoned and cries because she "doesn't know which shade of pink is the real one".
I accidently sent a dick pic to the group chat with her family. Right after they all said it was a pleasure having me for dinner. Wana drink with me?
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