Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
Just had a conversation with Jon gosselin
Until you fuck him in front of his kids stop wasting my time with stupid texts.
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
They pulled him over whille he had a fish tank full of beer in his front seat. He told them it coudn't count as an open container cause the top was on it.
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
I paused mid sex to tell him I wished I'd taken up barrel racing so I could ride better.
My new year's resolution was to squirt this year. I only have four months left. Help.
I watched Morgan Freeman explain the existence of nothing, now I'm afraid of sub - atomic particles. these egg rolls are outstanding
im so sad I can't openly talk about acid tab Sundays
Ask him to BK for an ice cream cone and do him in the car. That counts as a date
I FEEL LIKE HILARY MUST FEEL WHEN TRUMP MANSPLAINS AT HER
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
