Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Your dad touched me again.
I would do things to you that would get us burned at the stake if we lived in a puritan village.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
the boy next to me on the plane handed me a shot glass, then a perkaset, and told me to have a good week off..hellllo spring break.
btw he is cheating on one twin with the other. the main woman in his life has a mullet. I defiantly have either the coolest or weirdest uncle ever
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
So apparently I threw a potted plant at a clown last night and told him to get his life together.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
I found him in his pink and white boxer out side the dorm hall and the only thing he said was "it wouldn't let me in"
The number of times I have seen your cock and the number of times I have wanted to see your cock are different!
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Man i fell asleep on a random persons porch on the way home and woke up to the family banging on the windows trying to wake me up
We are so on opposite sides of the boobs spectrum
a girl walked up to me and asked if you were my brother. she shook her head and said 'im so sorry' when i said yes. what did you fucking do????????
Randomize