what ever happened to devon sawa?
fuck...who knows?
i'm really worried about him.
Remind me to tell you about the dream where im a fighting a super hero whose only weakness is sunkist.
This is the LAST time i'm accepting the excuse "tequila made me do it". Even tequila thinks buying all of nickelback's itunes singles is fucking retarded
Another night, another sound of my neighbor almost having an orgasm.
And she used to have such long ones. Sad.
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
It's all sex hats and vagina bandages with you isn't it?
you don't know what its like to have your bartender tell you that you owe him beer money infront of your mother at 3pm on a tuesday
More or less binge drinking as a giant grape seemed justified
Everyone looked at me like I just fucked a gopher and was wearing it like a hat
just woke up in a camero on the way to nebraska, i would appreciate it if you answered your phone.
Pretty sure I'm going to hell because of our friendship
Last one there wins
I fell asleep masterbating while watching family guy... This is what happens when girl's night gets canceled
Did I tell you that I told him I deleted his dick pics and he almost started crying?
All I recall is being at the strip club doing dark rum shots and then puking a question mark on the wall above the garbage can in the men's room and having diarrhea in the sink. 6th drunkest I've ever been without blacking out.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
