I pooped in a mop bucket.
WTF???
Their employee restroom was locked what kind of customer service is that
guys are not supposed to queef...right?
you started whispering 'the itsy bitsy spider' while you were putting your hands up my shorts.
she sang that "this little piggy song" to my balls. and somehow made it work, with me only having two balls instead of five.
I just witnessed two drunk midgets fighting over a graham cracker. I can die happy now.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
i dont care how hungover you are, go back to the frat house and get him. HE IS 11.
Slipping me an edible before my ochem final was not your brightest idea. Looks like I'm switching to business.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
I told her I was going to masterbate myself into a coma... We have another date on Thursday.
There are far too many naked dudes in your apartment, and they aren't even watching porn. I mean seriously, they've got the Lion King on.
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
But what if there are 6 people and they end up just pairing the off into 3 couples. Is it still an orgy?
if you're wondering why I texted you some girl's name at 4 am it's because you wanted to Facebook stalk the girl who gave that Irish guy we met at the Chinese food place her license and said 'call me'
RUDE you're the one missing half a nipple...
IT HEALED AND GREW BACK TO BE A FULL HEALTHY NIPPLE OKAY
Randomize
