i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
We're having the conversation about what happened last night, all we can come up with is that we came home, drank two litres of lemonade, I took one of her seizure pills and we fell asleep with sabrina the teenage witch on
Well, of course, to the untrained eye I look like a slut.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
I fell asleep at the bar. And the bouncer threw a snowball at my face.
dude you need a shock collar for some of the things you say when you're drunk.
Ps I just used the "If you give a mouse a cookie" defense in a real life situation. Suck it
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
I called him a "Beautiful Bastard" with "Beautiful Bastard Hair". That is how you pick up a guy from Denmark.
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
See I would make a great girlfriend. My surprises are sex and burritos. What else do guys want
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
My hook-up from last week somehow found me at the club, saw the girl I was trying to fuck, kissed me right in front of her, and walked off.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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