I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
the only time it's appropriate to sing In The Air Tonight by Phils Collins is while sake bombing at Cal Beach
um or while having sex on a train
You proceeded to call me a hoe and then informed me that Bear Grylls is and always will be more important than I am to you.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
My dad just called from upstairs on the house phone to tell me to bring him a beer. You tell me how I am.
Dude you don't even know. I spilled the tequila and it took 4 people to stop me from drinking it off the table.
You just kept screaming at everyone 'not to break your scarf' and doing somersaults
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
Its okay, i dont mind you drinking, im just surrounded by it, there is some random dude laying on your couch with a bucket that ive never seen before
Our house rule in beer pong, is that if you get the ball in the bitch cup.... you have to snapchat your balls to everyone on your friends list.
Called my house today and my 10 year old brother answered and asked if I was still in jail
I think he might be using me for sex. I also think I might be ok with that.
The guy I'm talking to drunk texted me his essay last night and he asked me to revise it
I'm just going to take the mature adult root and ignore him for a bit, and then pretend like I didn't see him jerking off.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Randomize
